It’s the office Christmas party: a source of equal parts shame and anxiety for men all over the world. It has the potential to either turn into something genuinely enjoyable, or spiral into a bottomless pit of awkward small talk, avoided mistletoe, and always the threat of a sexual harassment suit.
Thankfully, you read EveryGuyed, which means you even know how to look your best, even at a potentially tedious work function.
Talk of Christmas isn’t possible without mentioning sweaters. Christmas and sweaters go together like family gatherings and unspoken resentment, so wearing a sweater can never go wrong.
Just stay away from the bright Christmas themed sweaters, or anything featuring reindeer, jolly old men, or red-and-green color motifs.
While you might appreciate the irony, we can guarantee your co-workers won’t, and you’ll be getting ugly sweaters re-gifted to you for years. Go out and buy a really nice sweater, which trust us, is out there for those who seek it.
Christmas and sweaters go together like family gatherings and unspoken resentment, so wearing a sweater can never go wrong.
Don’t over think this. Go with something plain that compliments your sweater. If you’ve got a patterned sweater, wear a shirt that matches one of secondary colors on the sweater.
If you’re wearing a solid sweater, pick a complimentary color. For more advanced tips, you can always check EveryGuyed’s ‘Guide to Color Coordination.’
If you’ve got a patterned sweater, wear a shirt that matches one of secondary colors on the sweater.
There are pretty much two types of work environments: ones where you can wear jeans, and ones where you can’t. If you can’t get away with jeans on any other day, Christmas will likely be no different.
Stay conservative with a pair of nice khakis, and since it’s winter, get a pair made of a heavier weight material and in a darker shade.
If you can wear jeans, stick with a nice pair of fitted CK or Ralph Lauren jeans so you don’t look too casual. Think Matt Damon, not Lil Wayne.
There are pretty much two types of work environments: ones where you can wear jeans, and ones where you can’t.
You wear the same old shoes every single day to work, why not switch it up just this once? Have you got a pair of fresh kicks you want to show off? How about those Prada lace-ups you’ve never worn to the office? Here are just a few options and what they might say about you.
Your everyday shoes: “I appreciate this opportunity to interact and network with my co-workers in a social environment. Please, take my card.”
Designer dress shoes: “I am conscious of what others think of me and this company. What I wear reflects upon this company and its reputation.”
Air Jordans: “I’m younger than you, paid just as much you, and more than willing to talk to you for hours about music you’ve never heard of.”
Converse All-Stars: “I’m a laid back kind of guy. Comfort and practicality over style.”
Puma Sneakers: “I may be over thirty, but you can still pretty much talk to me about anything. Except pay raises.”
Uggs: “I quit.”
You wear the same old shoes every single day to work, why not switch it up just this once?
Dos and Don’ts:
Don’t: Blow it off. Your boss will notice who here really cares about being part of the work community. Just because your friend is throwing a wicked Hanukkah rager the same night is no reason to skip the party entirely. However, that’s not to say you can’t…
Do: Take off early. Tell your boss that you promised a friend you’d be at his party later, and wish him happy holidays. He’ll appreciate that you came out, and you’ll still be able to hit up your friend’s.
Do: Be interesting. If the party’s a dud, you might have to turn on your inner raconteur. However, once you’ve told a few stories, back off, and let someone else have a turn.
Don’t: Be too outgoing. We get that it’s a social event – but you have to work with these guys tomorrow. Maybe you shouldn’t tell that story about the thermos, the iPhone, and the lady bullfighter.
Do: Bring your girlfriend. A stable relationship shows a responsibility and reliability to your boss, while introducing your girlfriend to your work environment shows her you’re serious. Just make sure you and this girl are serious – bringing a different girl every year kills any points you may get.
Don’t: Have an office fling. You will almost definitely be fired, or go through hell trying to keep your job.
Don’t: Blow it off. Your boss will notice who here really cares about being part of the work community.
Got any Christmas party horror stories? Any tips to help you get out of a particularly boring golf story? The comment box below does more than just look good…